With the first snow in my real life, the first snow arrived in my second life as well. It took me a while, and some thinking, but I feel its snowy and just purrfect. I used some low lag snow all over the place, we got ice floes, snow slushes, piles of snow everywhere, and don’t forget the snowman or Santa himself, parking his sleigh behind my house. Maybe one can see him ride through the sky on Christmas?
I thought about using a nice aurora Borealis, but its really big, and I don’t know if my neighbours would appreciate it.
“Oh the weather outside is frightful
But the fire is so delightful
And since we’ve no place to go
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!
It doesn’t show signs of stopping
And I’ve bought some corn for popping
The lights are turned way down low
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!”
After that bad blew Jasp and I took we analysed the race, and worked on our weak spots. After finding some new start approaches, we digged deeper into the the spinnaker run, and woohoo, got OVER 14 knots out of that sweet girl!
We focused on our slowest lap, so we did just these legs several times, and I am pretty happy with the outcome.
Raceline : Winner: Jaspar Recreant ID#181 !
Race time: 00:15:00
Lap times — Start: 00:00:01 — Last lap: 00:14:59
Raceline : Winner: Jaspar Recreant ID#181 !
Race time: 00:14:46
Lap times — Start: 00:00:04 — Last lap: 00:14:42
“Oh the first snowfall of the winter
Was a day that we all waited for
When it drifted to and frost
Why you should’ve seen the snow
It was near seven feet or more
By the old barn door
Oh the first snowfall of the winter
What a joy for a boy to behold
In each house you’ll find a sleigh
That was waiting for this day
And of course, down the road a hill
For each Jack and Jill”
~ Lyrics by The Carpenters
This week was amazing, tough and weird and.. just everything all together. I started writing again, about everything but also about my healing heart. That probably helped me a lot, to push through my writers block. I met someone and he makes me smile and laugh, and my sister took me too a long overdue photo shoot. It was exhausting, but not just for me, also for the artist, because I got a new profile picture, by,, exactly, my sister Dakota, and it became sooo amazing.
I also started working on one of my boats again, another good sign for back to normal… but .. winter is coming..
Everyone of us knows that saying, but for those of us who live in Sailors Cove it is true. Winter is coming, tonight! Wait.. I think I heard doom bearing melodies all over the place! But I wouldn’t be me, if I wasn’t prepared, all of my land and home is already wintery, so I am sitting on my beach now, enjoying the warmth of a fire, and this new amazing picture of myself, while waiting for the first snow!
Sometimes I really hate bad luck. Everything seemed to be fine, Jasp and I were fit, full of energy, and ready to roll. But SL wasn’t with us this very nice Sunday. The day of the first snow. We got distracted slowly after the start, and came to late to the line and right into the wind shadow of Titus’ yacht.
Usually that wouldn’t be so bad, if the scripts wouldn’t be lagging and working… we hadn’t have that luck, and all the race we sailed like being in a wind shadow, as if our yacht would have been made from lead. Soon Kovu got us, brought us into another wind shadow, and the race was basically done, but we kept trying. We did everything like we did on Friday, and finally, on the last two legs, the boat seemed to be back in its place, and groove.
We came in third .. of three… but we came in at all.
Congratulations big time to Titus and Kovu, you really rocked today, you won well deserved. Therefore you will get from me a huge thumbs up and big huggies. If I hadn’t to leave so fast, that would have screamed for a beer together.
Wishing I was knee deep in the water somewhere
Got the blue sky breeze and it don’t seem fair
Only worry in the world is the tide gonna reach my chair
Sunrise there’s a fire in the sky
Never been so happy
Never felt so high
And I think I might have found me my own kind of paradise
It was Saturday again, and I found finally again the time to follow my passion. Like every weekend, the Rainbow Sails Yacht Club started a cruise, and Jasp and I right in the middle. This cruise took us through the Columbia River, up north to a pyramid, and than back south on a fast run home. It was an interesting and fast cruise, some tacking at the start, but a very relaxed way back.
It was partially a bumpy road, like every Saturday in SL Waters, caused Jaspar to drop of off my Flying Shadow, the Dragons Touch II. Maybe I should check his Harness, it might be defect. Considering the fact, that it was a fast cruise with a very fast boat, I had rare time to shoot some action pics, but I was able to get you a few at the first and only Rendezvous Point.
Kovu joined us with his, new? , OP 65 or OD 65, I am sooo bad with boat names – of boats I don’t own. But I loved it and I probably might get one too. This writer is sooooo weak.
But any ways, it was a great cruise, and I had lots of fun, no matter how bumpy it became by times.
I know, I know, no one likes people who gloat. But I can’t help myself, I have to do that. During Jaspars and my training today, we just rocked the boat and the Fruit Islands. After the first win in ages, we were a bit lazy this week, but this Friday, we got back practising, and Lord, we needed that break.
After a rough beginning, we made it right on the point over the start line, just to have our first really fast lap. Unfortunately Jasp hadn’t set up the line properly so it stopped recording BUT our HUDs kept counting and working.
Even with an almost 30 second slide after round one, and our rough start, we made the fastest run EVER on this course, with a 12M.
45:02 minutes, for three laps with some weird fiddling.. awesome. 1 minute and 24 seconds faster then last Sunday when we actually WON the race. I am really looking forward to Sunday. Jasp this one is for you, YOU ROCK!
Last night I checked in on my sister Dakotas set. She has another sister, a friend of me, and the two of us danced together. It was like dancing with the stars all over, because damn she got moves! I wanted to look clubby and fresh for once, so I stepped out of my comfort zone of blue jeans and shirts, and put on a mini and a cropped sweater. Did I felt exposed, heck I did, but I felt good too. And for the first time in a long while I really had fun, I was laughing and just got out there. I even enjoyed the music, which is a huge compliment to my sister Dakota, because I usually hate electronic beats.
It was awesome to dance and just have fun with the girls, although .. I was chatting via SMS (some would call them IMs) with a special someone.. and dang he made my panties drop so hard, that they just ripped a hole down to Australia. I think I need to ask a friend there to retrieve them, so I can get them back.
While the evening passed by, something happened, and I am really happy about it. I don’t know how or why but.. suddenly Ana told me, that I am a sister to her as much as Dakota is. That really warmed my heart. This way I am flattered, that we became family, even without being related by blood, or in the SL universe, related by bits.
I think, I should do that more often, getting out of my comfort zone, who knows what good it might brings, when I am out of my jeans…
“Like a ship at sea, I’m lost in a fog
My mind is hazy, my thoughts are blue
Guess I’ll always be kinda
Lost in a fog without you
It was sunny every day
The sky was fair above
But you took the light away
The day you took your love”
– Lost in a Fog by Ella Fitzgerald
After all that happened, I maybe really need some time out. Some ME-time, to gather my thoughts, to just get around all the stuff that happened. To be honest, sitting down, and writing, pushing through that writers block, is a first step, and now, with blog post number five I finally start feeling better, and more connected to my creativity. I missed that.
Yesterday I tried another approach, some lonely kayaking, in the morning fog, through Sailors Cove all up t the north of Second Norway. It was indescribable. Calm, fresh, I could really feel the frost biting my cheeks, the fog getting into my clothes, getting them slightly wet, while I was enjoying all the last colours of this wonderful autumn. An autumn that will be over soon, a little bird told me.
But after the kayak ride, I needed more, so I decided, to go out in my Schokker, a boat I haven’t sailed in a long time, and give her a run, all the way up to the Rene Marina. I don’t know how to put it but, this being alone, just enjoying the beauty of this second life I am happy to call mine, put everything back in a perspective and helps seeing the bigger picture. Plus, it helped me t get out of my bed, opening my notebook, and keep writing, until I don’t have to think twice, for a single word.
No I wont tell you that you know nothing, but I felt winter-ish and Christmas-ish, so I decided to have a long horseback ride through the famous Aero Pines Park, where they do have already winter and snow. My horse GG was more then happy for some movement. And while I was riding, and enjoying the cold air, I started thinking, that it would be nice to have an actual horse.
To get into it I try to explain. There are horse avatars, they do look amazing and very detailed. The animations are great and what can I say, I think I love them. The only problem is I don’t want to be one, I just like to “own” one. Bot in a more friendshippy kind of way.
I hoped to find some place where one could “adopt” a friend this way. Just like there are all the adoption agencies for kids and furries. But I couldn’t find one. All one can find, is the naughty kind of way, and that is by far nothing I would enjoy. So my question to all of you is, if you know such a place or maybe a horse-roleplayer, who would like to have an owner, to play with now and then, please tell me, I would love to meet them.
And maybe even help others with the same thing, people like me, looking for someone to be their horse, they can really build a connection with, and not just an attachment. No offence GG!
As I mentioned some posts earlier, I have a severe form of writers block at the moment, but I am trying to push through, to get back to myself. I tried to reflect on my thoughts, where this is coming from, and I have some ideas. The best way for me, to get over something like that, is writing and talking to friends. The second one I have done, so what is left, is to find the words, and bring it down to paper…
Some weeks ago, I vented, I blew of steam in a hard way, what is pretty rare for me, but it was necessary, to get back to myself, to be who I am. And again, everything starts with Mo, my ex-boyfriend, and … after latest results, obviously a friend with benefits. My ONLY friend with benefits. But to get where I want to be, I have to start at the beginning. After venting the last time, Mo and I met, and had a long conversation, we made up, and as soon as this happened, everything came back to me, not the anger, not the pain, but the reasons why I fell for him in the first place. Fast, hard.. and strong.
Back, when we met, I was like an emotional zombie. Hurt so often that one just exists beneath a protecting snow globe, surrounded by thick walls. But these protections, they do suffocate one too. Every breath was like.. filtered air, but steady filled with dust like being buried under ruins. One dies slowly, painfully and yet, one is still alive, and even tho it doesn’t feels this way, the pain one suffers is worse, then anything that ever was painful. Al the hurt I suffered wasn’t healing, but still there, crushing down on me like the weight of a hundred buildings.
A friend of me took me out for a dance, and I agreed.. she took her boy friend with her, so I was dancing alone, when this gorgeous man walked up to me, and just started talking in this.. fresh, easy way. Nothing felt pressured or planned. It just happened. And like a breeze of fresh air… a spring tide .. a tornado, all together, he shattered the snow globe, he pulled me out under all those buildings, stones and walls, like a fire-fighter saving a dying person.
We never had trouble to talk, we had fights, but we always settled them by talking and making love afterwards. And reflecting how I was.. how needy I became.. oh shit, I would have ran just like he did in the end. The way he saved me from myself, I also ruined us by being not the woman I was. I was independent and strong, and be came weak and depending, depending on him being there all the time, being strong for me.
The last year, I tried to get over him… tried to not think about the huge scar on my heart with his name on it. He wasn’t there often .. but when he was, we talked.. we spent time together, and we.. had sex. You may call it bad judgement, but gees, you should see him, he looks amazing – plus – he just knows. He knows everything about me, and he still likes me, enjoys my company. I always say, never get back together with your ex, because the reasons why you broke up, they still are there some how, maybe hidden but they don’t fade….
I will never forget what he means to me, still, and what he had done for and to me. Tho.. friends with benefits it seems to be. Will that make me happy? I don’t know, without Jaspar and Garith, my two companions maybe, but I have my companions, the two men in my life who make me happy, who accept me for the weird and crazy person I am. I wont say I am out of the woods yet, I am still hurt, but the air I am breathing is fresh, I cant feel walls around me, I cant feel a chain around my heart, slowing it down.
Tho the one thing, I will take with me, from all of this, is hope. Hope that one day, I don’t have to write about broken hearts any more. That I wont be said if someone shows up or doesn’t. The winter begins, and I have no one to snuggle? Oh my … I still have the fresh wind, blowing into my sails, and bringing me hopefully to new shores.
Xsenias 